Dating Tips Q&A: First Dates; Cures for Shyness and Pickiness

If you're fresh on the online dating scene, here are some tips to soothe first-timer anxiety. Remember to take things slow, and keep a positive outlook. This way you'll appear more confident and interesting to other searching singles!

Question: Help! The bar scene is just not working for me. Do you have any dating tips that will help me meet my "special someone"?
Answer: The rules of dating have changed. Consider trying an online service like Yahoo! Personals, where you have instant access to local singles that you might not otherwise have met. You can post your profile and photo for free and wait for people to seek you out, or you can do your own searching. Advanced search tools help you narrow your choices down to people who fit your criteria -- then you can easily sign up and start a conversation with as many people as you like.

Question: I've been talking to a guy online for a couple of weeks now, and he wants to meet in person. What precautions should I take for our first date?
Answer: Treat people you meet online just as you would a stranger you meet in a bar.
Use common sense and take simple precautions like telling someone where you're going, driving there yourself or even double dating with a friend. It's not a good idea to give a guy your address -- meet him in a public place. Most important, take time to really get to know him first and wait until you are comfortable before taking the next step.

Question: I'm painfully shy and have a hard time approaching women who I find attractive. I meet a lot of women through my job, but can't seem to get the nerve to ask them out. Any advice?
Answer: A lot of men get nervous about asking women out on dates for fear of rejection. If it's easier for you to express yourself electronically, try out an online dating service like Yahoo! Personals. This way, you can be yourself and get to know someone through email or instant messaging and you will begin to build confidence once you realize that all women aren't so intimidating after all. This also gives you the chance to play the field until you find the one woman that brings out your inner wild man!

Question: I'm a single parent without a lot of time, and I'm looking for someone to talk to. What can I do?
Answer:
Not everyone is looking for a serious relationship, and online personals are a great way to meet other single parents like yourself who are looking for companionship. It's a good idea to take things slow. Yahoo! Personals gives you a forum to meet and get to know someone on your own terms. There are millions of singles to choose from, and you may just find "the one."

Question: All of my friends have used Yahoo! Personals and are always going out on dates, so I decided to try it myself but am not getting the same results. They tell me I'm being too picky. What do you think?
Answer: Often, the main reason people don't get many results is that their searches are too narrow. Consider broadening your requirements. Don't limit yourself to "must make $200,000, have blonde hair and blue eyes, and live a quarter mile from me." If you live in a small town, you may want to search a wider radius to meet people outside of your immediate area. Don't be discouraged -- just like in the offline world, it takes time to meet that special someone.